


So This Is The Seventh Time You've Been Here?

by DaughterOfOphelia



Series: Crossover Challenge [7]
Category: MASH (TV), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Doctor-Patient AU, Gen, more of a drabble really
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-28
Updated: 2015-10-28
Packaged: 2018-05-28 04:24:04
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 292
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6314956
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DaughterOfOphelia/pseuds/DaughterOfOphelia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Day 11 : “ I’ve broken ten bones and you’re my doctor who just gave me your number because “Please call me the next time you attempt /anything/ remotely dangerous”. And now we text constantly and this is not an appropriate doctor/patient relationship. “ Doctor/Patient!AU<br/>MCU/M*A*S*H<br/>Darcy Lewis & “Hawkeye” Pierce</p>
            </blockquote>





	So This Is The Seventh Time You've Been Here?

**Author's Note:**

> EDIT: So... I decided to move each of my crossover fics into their own stories so they're easier to find. Both for me, and for anybody that'll read them.
> 
> I figured a Doctor/Patient AU was perfect, but I don’t think I added enough sarcasm. Or bad jokes. Or inappropriateness. It should also be noted that I’ve never been to a hospital or had any broken bones, so I have no clue what I’m doing. I’m pretty much mixing what I know from nowadays, what my mom’s told me, and from watching M*A*S*H.  
> Hopefully there will be more in this verse.  
> I know this is 11, and technically 7 should come after 6, but I've got writer's block... (Considering 7 is supposed to be a writer AU I thought it was a little funny...) To be continued at some point.

Darcy knew the drive to the small medical clinic far too well. Living around secret agents, superheroes, and Norse gods was dangerous, even if you didn’t live in the same building or fight alongside them. Sciencing was also very dangerous. Kinda like ‘Wormholes, explosions and kidnappings oh my!’ She let out a small yelp as the car went over a pothole.  
“Sorry Miss Lewis.” The suit driving, Agent Donegan, looked over at her, his eyes hidden behind dark wire framed sunglasses.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
“So beautiful, what got mad at you this time?” Dr. Hawkeye Pierce asked his new “favorite” patient as he looked her over. He’d noticed that every time she came in she had another broken bone. Last time it had been a rib, the time before that it was her arm. This time, it was her leg. A union fracture on the tibia of her left leg to be precise.  
Darcy scowled at him. “My shoe.” She wasn’t annoyed with him, she’d just had a very bad day. Thankfully one of the nurses had already brought her some pain medication. She huffed and told him as much, wincing as he prodded at her broken leg that already had the beginnings of a bruise.  
“Stop moving. Gosh, you think you’d know by now not to move when a doctor’s looking you over!” He said with a smirk. “And what a pretty picture you make!” He started immobilizing her leg.  
“Pierce! Stop being a lech!” The head nurse, Houlihan, shouted at him.  
“But Margaret, we’re getting along so well!” He yelled back, waggling his eyebrows at Darcy.  
“So I can see.” Margaret walked on over and picked up Darcy’s chart. “Alright, stats are normal. Broken leg.. This is the seventh time you’ve been here?”


End file.
